Hello Kitty

Yep, that is me with my new hat from my awesome friend, Connie.  Love my hat. So I am prepared for the no hair day. Which is coming up this weekend. Going to shear it off Fri of Sat.  Kind of exciting. - no more hair in my eyes, no more blowing my hair dry, just wash and wear. and my hat.

Today is Hello Kitty day because I am finding out what fatigue and weak means.  I feel good but this weekend was fatigued.  Which means I can do things but don't want too.

Today, Tuesday, I have gotten past fatigue but fell in the weak category - Hence the Hello Kitty as in weak as a kitten.  Not actually that bad. Just weak but still exercising.

Went to DR yesterday for labs and checkup. Doing good except of course I don't have any of the baby white blood cells. But they should be kicking in in a day or two.

So for the meantime I am relaxing in the goodness of the Lord. Thankful for a sweet husband and son - who makes me french toast.  : )

Just got to love my family.

I have flowers to look at, a garden that is growing, and love that passes all understanding.

I am writing. Yay me.  I will get this book done!!! And many others after it.

My creativity is not suffering.

Well, just wanted to give you a quick update.

Next Chemo date is Monday May 6th.  Pray that all my good levels are good to go so I can take the chemo.

Pray for strength for  me.  I have been pondering the verses - The  Lord is my strength, Where I am weak He is strong, The joy of the Lord is my strength.

Hmm lots to ponder and how to receive. Working on that.  : )

Blessings

Psalm 19:14
Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.

How is it going? Great!!!

Well this is day 2 after the chemo -smart bombs have gone off.
So far so good.

The day of chemo - just felt a heaviness. Not bad.

Day +1 woke up feeling good. Had a good day. Went and got my shot to help my white blood cells grow. We did errands and walked around the mall. Last night had some heart burn.

Day +2 - feel good. Had a shower. A little weak. But made french toast and gobbled it all down. No errands today. Although have to take hubby to eye dr for a checkup at 2:30

All in all - good!

What I know - is the Lord has me wrapped in a blanket of love. I feel it. From Him, from my friends and family.
My husband who is taking such good care of  me. My sweet son who is making me a garden for fresh veggies and flowers.
My awesome friend Kathie who gave me a quilt - anointed quilt made with love. My sister-in-law who sent me a bracelet to remind me God loves me and they do too. My lamb sent to me from a writer friend to remind me whose I am. And all my friends and family who are praying. I know those prayers are storming heaven and working.
 
I am blessed.

Verse of the day

Psalm 145:20

The Lord preserveth all them that love him

God Tough!

That's right. I am God tough because the Lord is my strength.
Verses on the Lord is my strength

So many good ones! Hard to pick just one.
Today is chemo -'smart bomb' day 1.
One of eight I will go through, at least for the first portion of my treatment.

Ephesians 6:10

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power.

Do I look strong?  Not sure but I am happy. not going to steal my joy.

And see the laptop. Not going to stop my writing either.

Right now chemo med #2 is dripping in me. Seeking bad cells to kill.  Yeah I know it is not supposed to know the difference between the good and the bad, but my good cells have a Holy Ghost force field around them. 

The first med - Big Red  - is already in and kicking cancer butt. Don't feel anything but I know my Lord is healing me. 

This morning, I was actually excited to begin the program. Being gifted with curiosity helps. That and living for the moment. Never have been one to think about next week. I live in today. I think that helps me too.

I have several anti nausea drugs in me. And they should keep my tummy from revolting. I read that I shouldn't do any strenuous exercise for 48 hours because of Big Red. So today I will walk and work on balance and breathing exercise. 

I am writing here. Already have done a little on my book. 

I have Bible studies to listen to  - a broth to make, eggs to boil, Food stuff to figure out.

Bills to pay. 

Right now I do feel a heavyness. Not bad, just enough to let me know that something is going on. must be the explosions of my smart bombs as they are bursting and killing the cancer.  Go Team!  I am God Tough! His strength is flowing in me and I shall overcome this.

God is good. I'll give updates about what is going on.

Love all my praying friends and family.

Weird or Wired - I have a PORT

Well, a lot has happened in the last few days.
Yesterday, I had an MRI of my breasts at 6:30 AM - morning. Early.

That was an experience. Not bad at all, just weird. Lay face down on a massage like table with holes for your breasts to go into. Noisy so they give you earplugs and headset so you can listen to music instead of the jackhammer whirring snapping noises.

And there is the cold rush of the dye going into your veins. But it wasn't a bad experience.

Then to go home, wait for a while, take a shower with antibiotic soap and off to Baylor for the PORT.
Wish it was the ocean kind but it was the in your skin kind of thing. Very weird to have something under your skin and a wire in your neck. At least that is what it feels like. Doesn't hurt but feels strange.

But it is better than getting that 'little stick' in your  hand or arm to put an IV in.  Only took 15 or twenty minutes to get it in, but hours of waiting around before and an hour after. Anyone facing the fact that you are getting one - don't sweat it. Not a big deal.

So what is next?

I go to a chemo class to learn about the drugs they are going to put in me and what to expect.

Then Friday - I get my first treatment.  Ought to be interesting.

No Fear.  The Lord has me and is with me.

And that brings me to one of the good things that God is working out in all this.  LOVE. Receiving love that is. In the Beatitudes Jesus starts off with Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

If you don't know you are in need, you're going to miss out. Face it, when cancer attacks, you need healing, help and to know that your friends and family love you. But if you don't reach out and open your arms to receive it - you miss out. And if you can't receive - you can't give out either.

Faith is not saying  - "I don't  have a problem." when you and everyone around you can see that you do. Faith is going on, speaking the Word and telling that problem to go in the Name of Jesus. Walking out your faith and healing and life trusting the Lord is with you and will guide you.

I may not see the next step in front of me, but I am sure that the Lord is with me, walking along the journey with me, believing that the healing is real and will come. I will live and not die. That I know.

And I am learning to receive the love from my friends. Be thankful for their prayers - and I am grateful for each and every prayer. We are not put in this life to walk it out alone. God gives us family and friends because we need them. And they need us. Together we learn to trust the Lord and are blessed by blessing each other.

On my next post I'll show you a special love gift of healing from my God connected friend, Kathy. I am so excited to see what God is up to in all this.

 **Verse of the day

Isaiah 41:10

¹⁰ Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my 

righteousness.

Update

UPDATE - I am up! Up for whatever comes my way because I have an awesome God who is walking the journey with me. Up because I have wonderful praying and believing family, friends, and church. UP because I refuse to let the enemy get me down.

SO - what is new?  The decision is done. I am going down the chemo trail. Although I have changed the name of chemotherapy to 'smart bombs'   Yes, as the chemicals course down my veins and arteries, they are smart bombs - charged with the mission to seek out and destroy all enemy breast cancer cells.

Before I take the smart bombs, I am praying for the Lord to shield my good cells and surround them with His boundless love and protect them.

I have instituted the policy of stranger danger.  If any cell in my body notices a stranger cell, they are to jump up and down call for the cancer fighting cells to seek and destroy the intuders. I learned that breast cancer - even if it leaves the breast and tries to settle in somewhere else - it is still breast cancer.  So I think my body can just decide if they are a bone cell and notice a breast cancer cell moves next door that it is just WRONG.

LOL  I am a writer so why not have some fun. I like my idea of smart bombs, shields, and stranger danger.

What's new?   Had a skin biopsy on my breast to see if the discoloring on my boob was inflammatory breast caner. The RESULTS - NO. And there is virtually no discoloring on my breast at all now. Good work boob. You are fighting.  Praying that the Lord would heal me miraculously and the cancer would disappear.

Had an echo cardiogram - heart was good
Had a stress test today. - I think my heart did well. Feels good anyway.

TUES - I will have a port put in me so they can pour in the smart bombs. Not a big deal maybe 30 minutes.  But they have to put me out. Guess they don't want my help.  : )

Still have a chemotherapy class to go to sometime - don't know when.

And Smart bomb therapy will probably start Friday the 19th.

NO FEAR  God is with  me all the way and I already know that I will live and not die.

I plan to get a lot of writing done. Probably will stick close to home since apparently the smart bombs can lower my immune system.

Determined to write everyday on my book. NO matter how I feel.  The enemy will not win and I am determined to write more than ever.

I have enjoyed the time spent with my husband. Too bad it is going to docs, but we've enjoyed the time with each other.

Well, that is enough for now. I feel great! I know this is going to be sweet time with the Lord. I am actually excited.

***Verse of the day!

Mark 16:17-18

¹⁷ And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues;
¹⁸ They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.

What is going on?

Hi friends.
Thought I'd put out a quick post and let you know what has been going on.

Mon - I spoke with a naturopathic doctor and ordered some supplements. He believes breast cancer follows a pattern of iodine deficiency in thyroid and domino effect from their. Sounded good to me.

Tues - went to heart doctor. Did ekg and there is something with left something or another. : ) So I have to have a echo cardiogram and stress test.  (Gee you'd think having a cancer attack you is enough stress)

Wed. - went to the oncologist. Really nice place filled with nice people. I like the doctor and she is a Christian. But only deals with chemotherapy.  The cancer that has attacked me is now listed as a Stage 3c. That is just a hair under a Stage 4.

Does that scare me?  NO. the Lord told me to fear not and I am still holding to that.

But I realize I have waffled from my standing on faith declaration a couple of Sunday's ago. And as a result I am in the valley of indecision. The T intersection is fast approaching. And I have decisions to make.

Do I go down chemo, surgery, chemo and radiation trail?

Or down the path of faith?

Even possible they are the same path.

So you see, I am struggling to make a decision.  At least I know, that whichever path I choose, I will live and not die. That I know. That I am sure of.

God is good and I believe  I will have a firm decision this weekend.

So pray for wisdom for me. and that I hear Him.

Love you all
FEAR NOT    The cancer is not going to take me out. THAT I know!

Verse of the week  [I will post to this blog on Thursdays]

Psalm 118:17

I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord.